Beans, a book, AND a new podcast?

we came to slay

New here? Hi! New recipes and companion videos land here weekly on Wednesdays, and you’re going to want to get in on that.

In today’s newsletter

• Comfort (is) cooking

• Yes, I’m working on my third book

• WTF is WDOYLSF???

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Hello to all of my solo diners!

Last week I released a new video and recipe for Personal Pot of Beans and Greens and while I have been behind on my writing, I have been rendered verklempt by the messages on YouTube and others that landed in my DMs.

This recipe is one of several that have been manifesting themselves in/through me over the past year and a half, a period that coincides with my separation and divorce after a two-dozen-year-long marriage. (I like saying two dozen because it doesn’t sound as big of a number.) I’ve written a little about those changes in my life here and here, got into collateral friend breakups here, and the sorta-sad origin story for my cozy bean dinner is in the intro to this video.

While my ex and I were sorting out our permanent living situation, we subletted an apartment and stayed there separately, on alternating weeks, while the other person stayed home with the boys. Being alone half the time and navigating the disentanglement from the relationship I had been in since I was 23 years old was rough, but it wasn’t always sad. It was disorienting and really tiring, and in other ways it was also validating. On the other side of a horrifically hard decision, I discovered feelings of relief, even if they sometimes came with grief. There were days where I swung from anger to misery, then to anxiety, finally landing on whatever the feeling is when you have popcorn and sake for dinner.